Bear of a Day

 

It’s been a brutal two days.  Readying oneself for a routine colonoscopy is one for the books.  The prep agenda is….shall I say, involved? 

 

I’ve had this procedure done twice before.  One would assume I would take it like a man.  Oh, wrong adage.  George had his procedure done last week and totally freaked out about the pre-cocktail beverage.  I’m just saying.

 

I’m not about to brag here about what a marvel patient I was.  For days (and days) I’ve dreaded this moment in time.  I apologize to my friends and family who have tolerated the incessant referrals to “my upcoming procedure”.  A great deal of worrying went into my thoughts on having to fast for 24 hours.  Eating is a religion to me.  I never miss a meal, and most days I manage to carve out an extra.   Even before the countdown begins (an entire week) one has to forgo nuts and whole grains.  I ask you….what’s left? 

So experience aside, my anxiety was peaking when I woke up on D-Day (that stands for Damn Day that the prepping was to commence).  My friend Faye was most kind to offer to distract me as I tackled the day armed with bullion, Sprite and tea….only clear liquids allowed.  Damn, I forgot to ask about Chardonnay…clear all the way to the bottom of the stemware!   Well, best to refrain from imbibing on prep-day.  I’m sure it’s in the rules somewhere.

 

The day did manage to pass albeit s-l-o-w-l-y, and at 6:00 last night I launched into chugging back the most god-awful concoction that the medical community has ever come up with.   It just defies swallowing.   Somehow it managed to bypass that pleasant gag reflex and went down the hatch.

That started the ball rolling….I was perking.  There’s no need to attempt to do anything (watch TV, read, relax….) while this part of the prep is taking place.  One must stay mindful of how many steps it takes you to reach the water closet.  My chair inched closer and closer.

 

I’ll spare the reader of any further details.  Another 16 oz. bottle consumed at 5:00 AM had me completely ready for scoping.  You’ll have to take my word on this.

 

The Procedure went well.  The staff at Southside Community Hospital is spot on….professional and pleasant.  I’m pleased to have met their acquaintance, but I’m thrilled (bar any catastrophe) I don’t have to see them again for 10 years! 

I couldn’t wait to get home to EAT.  My anesthetist’s  parting words were, “don’t eat for at least 3 hours”.  My response, “you bet”. 

 

I just polished off the best scrambled eggs I have ever eaten.  It’s a wonderful thing.

Killing Time

George and I teamed up with friends, Faye and Chuck for a Saturday afternoon road trip.  Being one of my all-time-favorite things to do (sojourn into the unknown); the practice is becoming less practical and certainly less environmentally appropriate.  One is hard pressed to justify just killing time…..killing the ozone.  But leaving moral compasses at home and shelving any latent guilt, we set out to do just that. 

The afternoon unfolded in perfect order.  We took the scenic route up to Nelson County passing fields of grazing cows and horses.  We followed streams under and past old mill sites and stopped a time or two to appreciate impressive standing ruins of what once was.  We rode past Inglewood Lavender farm in Arrington and considered stopping for one of their advertised lavender massages, but thought the better of it….and besides, it was closed.  We opted instead for a pint of Full Nelson, hopping with flavor and served up at Blue Mountain Barrel House.  Our newly discovered brew pub was a sweet surprise, and we perched atop a high-top to listen to a few songs strummed out by a threesome from Asheville.

A visit to Saunders Brothers farm market was on our list.  It’s the season for apples and if you’re in the market, that’s the place to get ‘um.  Yep, the Saunders family operates  a first class market and have for over 50 years.  It’s widely acclaimed for the best peaches in August and apples in November.  We filled up the back of the Green’s SUV with Pink Ladies and homemade jam, and shoved off.  Lynchburg was next up.

Sipping on cider and munching on muffins that Faye pulled out of a hat, we toured around the campus of Sweet Briar College. What a beautiful spot!  Should any of you still have a daughter looking at institutions of higher education, it’s worth considering.  Who knew they offer an engineering degree!

Our final destination for the outing was historic downtown Lynchburg.  While looking for  Waterstone Pizza and Jefferson Street Brewery, we wandered through the Craddock Terry Hotel.  Once a shoe factory, now it’s a tony waterfront boutique hotel.  Quite the ticket.

We did locate Waterstone and enjoyed some great wood-fired pizza….beer for the gents and wine for the ladies.  It’s definitely a popular spot and there were plenty of folks waiting for tables as we left for home.

Great fun and great friends.  Not a bad way to kill a day.

 

Drive By Viewing

I did a double take when I spotted this sign the other day.  Yes sir, right here in Farmville you can have a “quickie” and get on with your business.  I mean, really? 

 

What with all the stepped up, fast pace our lives have spun into, I suppose it stands to reason that paying our respects to the dear departed needs to get with the program.  I figure it was laid out (no pun intended) to happen. 

Now I admit, I don’t know a whole lot about the “viewing” custom.  It’s never been a tradition I’ve embraced.  My way of thinking, is that it’s supposed to be a way of saying goodbye, and an opportunity to take one last glimpse - so you won’t forget.   Mind you, a casket propped up in an eight by ten foot display window takes a bit of getting used to.  Takes away a bit of reverence, I’m thinking.

Then there’s the dilemma posed to the funeral home attendant….who gets to be front and center?  How does one know they’re getting the right viewing?  Maybe the driver pulls up and talks into a little speaker…ordering up his next of kin.  

 It’s all a mystery and just too much for me to take in.  Just give me an old fashion send off.  Bring some fried chicken and a chocolate cake by the house, and raise a joyful song in the chapel.  No drive by viewing for me please.